The Injustice League

There are many, many perceived injustices in the world today. The BP oil spill, Banks being bailed out by the government, People today are feeling like they are getting the short end of the stick.

But larger scale issues are not the ones that hit home the most. It’s the issues that are personal in nature and affect a group of hard working American’s. That issue is the lack of 31” length work pants in retail stores. Maybe it’s because as a group us “31’s” have not produced any presidents or world leaders our most famous 31 is this company:

They have more than 50 Flavors so this doesn't even really count.

Is this a devious Corporate America plan to deny those individuals their right to quality business casual wear? Check out the selection of pants from pictures taken from a hidden camera by our crew:

The problem is that there are hundred of pants with lengths of 30 and 32 inches. This I can understand. It was explained to me by the store that it doesn’t make sense to make pants in 1 inch increments. The problem is that about half of the pants I saw were 29L’s.

So after looking through virtually every pair of pants (about 500 I am estimating). Here is what my options ended up being.

The perfect length (31L) but a waist size W38 that would require me to gain 30lbs or be forced to wear the dreaded belt AND suspenders.

The perfect waist size but a length (L30) that only Urkle could pull off….

I was now down to option 3….and the L32’s which are too long.








At this point you are asking yourself, “Why don’t you just buy pants with the longer length and have them hemmed?” That is what I typically do but in this world of cheap labor I am thinking to myself “Why am I the only one that can’t take advantage of incredibly cheap Indonesian slave labor just because I am an L31?”



So where does one go when one wants answers….it’s obvious you google it.



Unfortunately Google was not able to help in this endeavor. It was at that point that a saying my father always used to say came to my mind “Don’t try and reinvent the wheel”. While I clearly think it’s ok to reinvent the wheel as long as you beat the guy that really invented the wheel to the patent office; it now became clear where to go to solve this issue. Let’s go back to the basics:

Of course the yellow pages and Qwest Dex. As soon as I looked over and saw the trusty old book I knew the answer was at my finger tips.

I now am sporting a fine pair of 34W x 32L work pants thanks to “Dex”….